


Dragon and the Ice

by savingdame



Category: The Devil Wears Prada (2006), The Princess Diaries - All Media Types
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Humor, Romance, but WE ALL NEED A FANFIC BETWEEN THOSE TWO QUEENS, i will go to hell because of this fic, telling ya
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-24
Updated: 2015-04-06
Packaged: 2018-03-19 10:19:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 17,228
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3606510
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/savingdame/pseuds/savingdame
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After not talking for 40 years two women meet again, but is the past forgotten?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. When?

**Author's Note:**

> Italics are for retrospection and sometimes thoughts.
> 
> And of course, please remember, English is not my mother language.

 

"Your Majesty?"

Asked Charlotte, walking into not very big office in Genovian consulate in San Francisco. 

"Yes?" 

"Considering what have happened few days prior, there are some people who are more than willing to interview you ma'am. One of them is.."

Charlotte made a short break to gather her thoughts. After all the Dragon Lady had had some reputation - even in Genovia. 

"Well one of them is Miranda Priestly from Runway." 

Clarisse raised her head sharply, already feeling pain in her neck, when she heard the infamous surname. Of course she knew who silver haired woman was. They had known each other - a little bit too well. 

"What does she want?"

Queen tried her best not to lose her facade which she had been building all life, since that awful evening decades ago. 

"Erm, she wants, I think.."

"You are rambling, Charlotte."

"I am sorry"

The younger woman apologised, giving 'Ice Queen' gentle smile.

"She wants an interview and photo shoots, ma'am."

She continued, feeling slightly nervous. 

While everyone knew that after King Rupert 'King Rupert may he rest in peace" passed away and her son Philippe had died in terrible car accident, Queen would never give an interview - not to mention photo shoot - only Miranda fucking Priestly could be bold enough to ask for it.

"Could you please put me on line with her, though I will take the call in my suite?"

That was the last thing Clarisse wanted to do. Last time they spoke things got a bit complicated. Walking towards her chamber, Clarisse's mind wander to the last time they had seen each other.

 

_Her long blond hair was hanging loosely down her back and hot tears were running down her face like little drops of rain which had been running down the glass. Her heart was breaking, her head pounding and still she hadn't said a word. Taking a sip of her tea she quickly brushed her tears away and put her best smile on._

_"What are you up to?"_

_Asked younger woman, who just got up from bed. She took small steps towards Clarisse who sat on the large windowsill._

_"Me? Oh nothing, just thinking about this and that."_

_She smiled, tagging younger's woman hair behind her ears._

_"Clari, I know you. You don't possibly think, I would have believed that rubbish, do you?"_

_Clarisse's heart started beating faster, knowing that her answer would destroyed every beautiful moment they had shared. She stood up and draw younger woman closer to her body. After a second, or two, her lips touched the other's. It was not passionate kiss nor was it fast. That was that one which said more that million words_

_"When?"_

_Asked Miranda, trying to hold her sadness away from her already trembling voice._

_"I have suspected from some time. I only got to know few weeks ago. I am getting married... to..soon-to-be King of Genovia"_

_Her voice tighten and few lonely tears went down her pale face. Without saying a word, Miranda turned around and disappeared._

 

When she arrived, she made herself comfortable on the armchair, taking off her shoes. Everything sounded so surreal, why would Miranda want to talk with her now? Clarisse knew that this damn interview was just an excuse for her. Since that evening years ago they both decided to finish the chapter between them. Was that love? She felt the butterflies in her stomach every time Miranda had touched her, she was happy every time she had heard her lovely voice. She was herself – Clarisse Bonnet, not Lady Clarisse everyone else wanted her to be.

"Hello?" She asked, picking up the phone. 

"Good morning, Your Majesty."

Miranda's voice was cold. It became as cold as Clarisse's voice. 

"Good morning, Miranda. What do you want from me, if I may ask?"

Her voice was shaking, on the edge of crying.

"You do know what I want Clarisse..."

Shiver went down Queen's spine, hearing those words. The same words she had heard all those years ago. 

 

_"Clarisse?"_

_Soft voice called after her when she was leaving university's library._

_"Would you like to come for a night cup to my room tonight?"_

_Miranda gave her the brightest smile, showing her perfectly white teeth._

_"Yes.. I'd like that very much." Clarisse answers, turning to leave._

_Her mind was on fire. She was excited, happy and bloody well nervous. Yes, they had flirted a little bit and sometimes touched hands - but until that night it was everything they'd done. Couple of hours later Clarisse knocked gently on Miranda's doors feeling as if she was going to die with excitement. After few seconds Miranda opened the door with the most amazing smile future Queen had ever seen._

_"I am so happy you came!"_

_She smiled, hugging her friend._

_“Yes, me too.”_

_She  answered , walking through the doors._

_Clarisse could feel her  heart  burning her chest and blood running through her  veins , making her blush._

_“Are you okay”_

_“Erm yeah, I am okay. I am sorry. That was some crazy day today.”_

_She smiled,  sitting  down on the floor like they used to do it all the time._

_“Cup of tea, coffee or do we actually want wine?”_

_“Wine maybe? I don't  feel  like like tea today. Which, yes I know, is very surprising.”_

_Both women  laughed  softly, looking into each others' eyes._

_They had known each other from University, even though there was few  years  between them. They both had studied History of Art and Political Science. They had met on the opening of  exhibition  about Genovian art. Clarisse being only true Genovian by that time at University host the  event  and they talked. Longer they had  previously  thought. About art. About history. About life. And about love. Shortly  after  they had become best friends..._

_“Yes, wine sounds best.”_

_Said Miranda, pouring them both glass of red wine. She sat next to Clarisse, crossing her ankles._

_They hadn't felt the need for talking. They felt comfortable in each other  company  and sometimes silence was the best music that one could dream of. Loud heartbeats, labor  breathing , blood running through the veins._

_“What do you want Mirada, if I may ask?”_

_Bonnet asked, looking at her friends from behind her long lashes._

_“You do know what I want Clarisse. More than anyone. And...”_

_She stopped taking her glass away from  between  Clarisse's fingers._

_“and you want it too.”_

_Miranda brushed older woman hair away from her forehead and gently touched with her fingertips. Clarisse's skin was on fire. Her whole body was on fire, she could feel how red her  cheeks  are, how her hands are shaking, because suddenly she became wanton. Wet and wanton for young brunette named Miranda Priestly._

_“God help me, I do.”_

_She closed the distance between them, kissing her softly parted lips. Within a moment the kiss become more fanatic and arousing._

 

“Well, it would be easier if you told me what you want because I am in no mood for guessing, Mrs Priestly.”

Anger had overwhelmed her voice, when she tried her best to sound normal and relaxed. But Clarisse could feel that she was “losing it”.

“What would you tell for a lunch so I could explain everything?'

“Fine but I am bloody well not flying in to New York just because you want to have lunch. I have work to do, as now whole world knows.”

“I am in San Francisco, as a matter of fact. Business trip but I thought I could come and say hi for the old friendship sake.”

Miranda smirked, and played with her short silver coloured hair.

“Tonigh. I am too busy through the day. Amelia needs help and I frankly have short time to get her ready.”

Said Clarisse, knowing that it would be a very long day ahead.

“Okay, meet me and Four Season. I will be waiting. And Clarisse? I am sorry for your lost...”

“Yes, thank you. See you then.”

She hung up on the phone, feeling hot tears running down her face. 

 

 _'This is not good idea Clarisse.'_ She thought to herself, pouring fresh made tea into delicate china. 

 


	2. Pinot Noir

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Demones of the past

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Italics for the thoughts and retrospects.

Walking into Four Season many people had recognised her. Her silver hair and big sunglasses were her hallmarks. She didn't smile, not with too many people and their annoying phones with cameras around. Arriving at the table in more private area of restaurant, she looked thought the wine menu. And there it was, Pinot Noir 1964. The same wine they had shared all those years ago. Corner of her mouth twitched upwards, when she asked waitress to bring that particular bottle to their table. 

“Who will join you, Mrs Priestly?”

Young girl asked and Miranda could hear the fear in her voice.

Turning to her and giving her soft smile she answered “Her Majesty, Clarisse Renaldi. So please make sure everything is on the highest level. We wouldn't like Her Majesty being disappointed now, would we?”

“No, no. Of course not. I will be at your service all evening, ma'am. Just raise your hand if you ever need me, ma'am.”

“Will do. For now only that wine and..”

Miranda smirked, eyes scanning the young woman in front of her.

“and Starbucks, very hot one with no foam.”

“We don't do Starbucks, Mrs Priestly.”

Giving waitress one of those so cold “bloody look that could kill” she smiled and said:

“That's all.”

Not waiting for girl's response she got back to the book she was reading. After short while she had realised that she didn't remember any word she had just read, her mind was slowly drifting to events that took place years prior.

 

“ _God, help me, I do.”_

_Clarisse closed the distance between them, kissing softly Miranda's parted lips._

_Within a moment the kiss became more fanatic and arousing. Her hands went into blond curls, when the battle had started. First slowly but with every seconds both of them had become more bold with their actions. Clarisse's hands moved to Miranda's sides, causing young woman to moan into her soon-to-be lover mouth._

“ _Tell me to stop. Tell me when I still have coherent thoughts left. Tell me, because in a minute it will be too late.”_

_Miranda begged, knowing that with a matter of moments she would not be able to stop._

_She tasted Clarisse's honey lips and she didn't want anything else. She wanted her so badly. She wanted to feel her curves under her fingers, her soft like a feather skin. Taste every little bit of her goddess. Clarisse, however, hadn't been listening. She had moved so that she could easily straddle her hips._

“ _Stop thinking, darling.”_

_She said with that perfect voice of hers._

_Her fingers danced around little buttons on Miranda's silk blouse. After few seconds she saw her alabaster skin contrast with the black of her lacy brassiere.._

“ _You are beautiful.”_

_Clarisse whispered into her ear, moving her lips slowly down her neck to collarbone._

 

 

“Daydreaming now, were you?”

Asked Clarisse, when she sat down at the table.

“As a matter of fact yes. Just some lovely events from the past.”

She answered, looking up at older woman who looked so different, yet so similar.

“Joseph, can you leave us and wait outside the door?”

Clarisse didn't look at her bodyguard, she, however, look straight into Miranda's piercing green eyes.

“But Your Ma..”

Joseph tried to protest.

“Wait outside, please.”

She said with the ice and firmed voice.

“Of course. Just call me if you need me.”

He smiled, turning to leave his Queen with the Dragon Lady.

“You've changed.”

Commented Miranda, picking up her coffee.

“So have you. Did I hear correctly? How does it go? The Dragon Lady with ice instead of heart?”

Clarissa smirked, giving her fake smile.

“Oh don't flatter yourself. Ice Queen who wears only black after Rupert died? You wore it for how long? 3 years? Don't get me wrong, but you look awful in black. Too much is too much, Clarisse.”

“No asked your opinion, Miranda.”

She snapped, when waitress came to their table.

“Hello. My name is Amanda and I will be at your service tonight, Your Majesty. Is there anything I can get you?”

Girl smiled gently, feeling as if she was going to faint in few moments.

Before Clarisse could respond Miranda spoke.

“Black tea. But first pour milk into a cup – one quarter – then holding tea infuser over the cup, pour water through it. Don't add sugar or you will get to know one of her infamous queen glare.”

Waitress stood there looking between two women who were gazing into each other's eyes.

“Everything else? Shall I bring the wine now or would you like to have it with your dinner?”

“It's up to Her Majesty, isn't it? After all she is the Queen here.”

Miranda couldn't resisted to make the comment, smirking at Clarisse whose face kept becoming more red with anger every minute.

“Cut it Miranda. I am not in a mood for your crap.”

Clarisse snapped again, eyeing her ex-lover. Thank god, the waitress disappeared before she would see her 'losing it'.

“What do you want?”

She asked, trying her best not to cry in front of Miranda.

So many had happened, so many feeling suddenly came back. It was overwhelming. She could feel the tension between them, she could feel all unspoken words, feelings, thoughts. And part of her – the smallest one – was happy that she was sitting in front of woman who had held her heart for so many years.

“I believe Charlotte told you. Before you say no, please listen to me. People want to know about you and Mia. And considering that the secret has been revealed now, I thought that maybe it would be better if I did the interview rather than those shit gossips magazines. Which also leads to the photo shoot. Come on, Clarisse. Everyone else is way too scared to ask you about it, let's face it. Last time you gave an interview, not to mention photo shoots, was shortly before Rupert died. On your wedding anniversary and since then nothing. People want to know, Clari.”

Clarisse's heart hurt when she had heard nickname. Miranda was the only person who had called her that. Only person who remembered how she loved to be called.

“It is Clarisse. Do not call me 'Clari', she does not exist anymore.”

Was it sadness or anger in her voice?

“Okay, I am sorry. The point is, Clarisse,”

Miranda on purpose emphasized her name, looking into her gorgeous blue eyes.

“they are concerned. You clearly have no idea how many people do care about you and want to see you happy.”

“Even if what you're saying is true, why did you actually call? Please just tell me the truth, after all I deserve that after all those years.”

Tears were in her eyes, when she looked at silver haired woman.

“I got your wine, ladies. Pinot Noir, 1964.”

Young woman smiled, even though neither Clarisse nor Miranda had paid attention to her.

“You remembered?”

Clarissa's voice tighten.

“Of course I did. How could I have possibly forgotten? After all such beautiful memories were made after that wine, weren't they?”

Suddenly Miranda looked at her with the same love that Clarisse had seen all those years ago.

“I called, because I saw your unhappiness, Clarisse. And even after all those years, even after what have happened, I remembered your smiles and you happy laughter. Where are you now?”

Miranda, who would never have showed this kind of emotions in public, looked at her ex-lover and all she wanted was to hold her and kiss her soft lips. After all this time, she wanted nothing more than have her Clari back.

“How are the twins?”

“Oh for fuck's sake, Clarisse! Why do you always do that? Always change the subject when things get uncomfortable to talk about?”

“Why? Pretty damn simple. Because I can. After all, as you said it yourself, I am bloody queen and I can do whatever the hell I want. You don't know me anymore, Miranda. I am not the same person I had been 40 or so years ago. I have changed, I moved on and I forgot. I wanted to forgot, because I never got the happiness I so badly craved for. Your fucking Clari doesn't exist anymore. Ice Queen, Clarisse Renaldi took her place ages ago. No, if you please, call my assistant. She will plan everything. I will give you that fucking interview and photoshoot and you will disappear again, as quickly as you came back into my life.”

Clarisse down her glass in one sip and turned around to leave, not looking at younger woman.

“We're leaving Joseph. Now.”

She commanded, walking through the restaurant. She put her glasses on, so that no one would see hot tears which were now slowly going down her face. Back in the limo, she looked through the window and saw Miranda standing with Clarisse's black scarf in her hands. “Fuck's sake” she thought, playing with her fingers.

“So, do you want to talk about it?”

Asked Joseph, sitting next to her Queen.

“How much have you heard?”

“Pretty much everything, Clarisse.”

“Well so you probably worked out we have past together and this time past is too painful to talk about. ”

She turned her head towards window again and let the tears freely run down her cheeks again.

 

_'That really was shit idea, Clarisse'_

 


	3. Until one night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It needed to be said to get to know their story better.

Stepping onto balcony Clarisse picked her phone up, dialling Joseph's personal number. 

"Good evening, Joseph." 

She said, taking sip of her already cold green tea. 

"Hello yourself." 

Joseph replied, smiling. 

"I am sorry to bother you on this ridiculous time but I would really need a friend now.

She sighed, looking at old clock, hanging on the wall. There were couple of times when Clarisse needed shoulder to cry on. Joseph and Queen had always had been close. They had understood each other - maybe it was lack of happiness or maybe just their loneliness they had feel among so many people around them. 

That particular day when her voice broke into silent sobbings in the limo, she had felt as if she was breaking into uncountable pieces. Demons of the past causing pain, had come with impact, wrecking havoc  in her soul, already lost mind and broken heart. 

"Kitchen or gardens?" 

Hearing Joseph's soft voice, Clarisse smiled through salty lanes of tears. 

"Gardens maybe? I could use the fresh air." 

"Right aways, Your Majesty. Meet me outside your office."

"Yes, that would be lovely. Let me get dress first, though."

Putting on her glasses, she hung up and made her way to her bathroom. After long hours of working Clarisse looked much different. Her always perfectly fitted dresses and skirts were thrown away to the back of her wardrobe. They had been replaced with old Rupert's shirt and her favorite black jeans. 

She looked in the mirror and saw pain. Pain written all over her face made her alabaster skin grey. Her usually bright blue eyes become dark and - she found it hard to admit - terribly sad. 

How could she let that happen? How could she let Miranda come back to her life? She thought about the words she had spoken in the waves of anger. Clarisse Renaldi had never found the happiness she had felt being Clarisse Bonnet. Only time tears of joy ran down her face was when she have a birth to her two beautiful children. Though Rupert had been a good husband and even more wonderful father, never had she felt the love and desire she had so badly craved for. 

Buttoning up her shirt and enfolding herself in cashmere shawl, Clarisse slowly walked out of her suite. After short distance she saw Joseph with bottle of whiskey and two glasses. 

"Thought we may need something stronger than tea."

Queen chuckled a little, brushing his cheek with her left hand. 

"Always know what I need, don't you Joseph?" 

He smiled, taking her hand and walking towards beautiful gardens. 

"But of course, Your Majesty. After all it's what I am suppose to be doing, isn't it?" 

Clarisse smiled feeling how her body relaxed due to the gentle wind that had touched her exposed skin. 

"Can we go a little bit further? What I am about to tell you, should never be heard by others.: 

Queen Renaldi felt wave of nausea passing through her body. 

"I thought as much. There is a one dead spot where we can sit on the grass and no one would see nor hear what is being said."

Clarisse smiled nervously as they walked to the old pear tree. As she sat down, she looked up in the night sky. Stars, as if giving her courage and comfort, shimmered and the same gentle wind overwhelmed her tired body. Not caring about Joseph, she put cigarette between her parted pink lips. 

"Even I did not know you were smoking."

She laughed, taking a long drag. 

"Well, that's the dirty pleasure of mine. Charlotte knows. As you are so well aware, I can't go to the store by myself. Just imagine that."

"That's true."

"Exactly. That is something I truly hate. I don't think you have any idea how awful it is to feel useless and like you depend on someone all the bloody time." 

"Come on, Clarisse. You're not useless."

"Obviously not. I am the queen after all, but it is not what I mean Joseph." 

Taking glass with amber liquid, she looked at Joseph and hot tears ran down her face again. 

"We were together." 

If Joseph was stunned to hear that, she most certainly hadn't showed it. 

"It was of course before my arranged marriage to Rupert. We were together back when we were still at University together. I was older by few years. I never had much friends, quite like now really. I did suspect my future. When I was little girl but parents had been spending loads of time at the Palace. Anyway we met on art exhibition. Since it was about Genovian art and I was the only true Genovian by that time at uni, I was the host." 

Clarisse downed her glass in one long sip, feeling warmth of gold alcohol in her stomach. After short break she continued.

"I just remember she was interested in everything I said. She asked questions. We even had a little argue!" 

She chuckled. 

"She was intelligent and beautiful. She had, then, stayed for after party. We talked, walked and drunk too much. I believe it's how it all had started - 40 or so years ago."

Joseph was silent. He knew his Quee. If she was interrupted it was most likely she would stop talking. He put arm around her shoulder. She smiled, laying her head on his chest. 

"I did not know what it was back then. I still don't know. After all this time I have muddle in my mind. Yes we had slept together. Maybe it was love or maybe just lust. I have no idea but she was closer to me than anyone ever was."

Clarisse sighed, brushing her tears aways. Why, she asked herself, was it so hard; even after all those years. 

"Until one night."

Seeing Queen's hesitation, Joseph kissed her forehead saying:

"You don't have to do it, Clarisse."

She looked at him through her teary eyes. 

"But I do. You need to understand, Joseph. No one else knows about it. It was, well still is, a secret for 40 years and now I am losing it. I am losing myself if I have ever held myself after that terrible evening."

Joseph nodded, squeezing her arm. 

"Okay. Well, take your time. We don't have to work tomorrow."

Saying so, he had poured alcohol into her glass.

"We both had known that something would happen that day. I was more quiet than usual and Miranda was happier than ever. it was how she dealt with sadness and stress back then. After dinner we had talked. I told her I was leaving. Frankly, it was the day of my graduation. I spent 8 years studying things I truly loved. I hoped it would my future. My dream was to be lecturer, I was good at it. I never wanted to be a Queen. It was not my fairytale. Anyways, I told her I got the letter from home few weeks prior and apparently I was getting married to soon-to-be King of Genovia. She turned around and never had I seen her again. Until today." 

She was broken. Tears were freely going down her face. She put arms around her knees, rocking back and forth. 

"And now I have no idea what to feel, what to think or how to act. I never had an opportunity to tell her the truth, to apologise, to explain. She turned around and left. You know rest of the story. 3 months later I was both married and pregnant."

Joseph smiled, remembering how - all those years ago - she would swear while being in labour. 

"And after night I have changed. I have become cold, the way I am now. I was loving mother but look at me now Joseph. I have no idea how to act around my own granddaughter. I can't show love, I am unable to do it. I want to scream, because I cause her pain. Mia deserves more than I can give her. And Miranda? She has changed as well. She has become the Dragon Lady she is now. That night made us bitter, colder, without those feelings we most craved for." 


	4. I have never stopped, Clarisse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Italics for the retrospections.

After she came back to her suite, Clarisse made her way to the bathroom. There was nothing she needed more rather than to have a long soak in the bath. Just before she turned the water on, her phone –made noise. Not bother to look at the screen she picked it up.

“Hello Joseph.”

She said, smiling. It is wonderful what one talk can do. She felt better, it was nice to get away from the secret that had to be kept for 4 decades.

“Well, last time I checked it was Miranda”

Silver haired woman chuckled lightly. 

"Heaven's sake, how did you get this number and the hell you want?" 

Oh she was angry. Clarisse could feel her blood pressure raising up and pain in her chest.

"I told you Clarisse, you do know what I want." 

Miranda smirked, knowing that Queen Renaldi was 'losing it'.

"Don't you change the subject now, Miranda. I told you to call Charlotte, we have nothing to talk about."

Clarisse snapped. 

"Oh really? Because I get the impression that there is something you wanted to tell me."

"I wanted to tell you. Oh believe me, I wanted to scream. But it was 40 years ago when you and your fucking ego got in the way. It's better to turned around and walk away, isn't it? It is what you do the best, isn't it? Turning around and walking away. But it is still better to accuse me of change the subject, when I bloody can do it. Just listen to yourself, Miranda. I had docent life, please don't make it more complicated now. It already is. Just please. I will give you the interview, even that photoshoot but it is all Miranda. I don't think I can take it, having you in my life but acting as if we have no past. That hurts too much."

Both women were crying. Hot tears were running down their faces. The sadness, the pain, the awful demons came back.

"I have never stopped, Clarisse."

Queen's heart stopped beating for a few seconds.

"Miranda, please. Please, don't say that. Don't make it harder than it already is."

 Clarisse begged, feeling how her knees weakened, making her slip down the wall. 

"Listen Clarisse, can we meet tomorrow and have that interview and photoshoot? Just give me one day. I deserved after all those years." 

Was it sadness in Miranda's voice? Clarisse sighed, brushing away her tears. 

"You have one day. And I swear if I didn't like some of the questions I will walk away." 

Miranda could feel the knife thrown into her heart. All those years ago she walked away, not giving Clarisse any chances to explain nor to apologise. 

"Okay. I will email all the details to your assistant. Just, can you bring you tiaras? You do look lovely in them." 

Clarisse laughed. For the first time in 40 years she could feel the same butterflies she felt when Miranda was near her. 

"Oh do shut up!" 

"Okay, okay, okay. Bye bye Clari." 

And she hung up, leaving Queen on her own with her thoughts. Sighing Clarisse smiled, knowing that the next day would change everything. 

 

~*~

Miranda couldn't sleep. Her mind was racing and her heart pounding. After downing two glasses of Scotch, she still could feel those wonderful butterflies in her stomach. 

 _'You'd better make it good Miranda_ ' she thought to herself, getting up from the bed. She was going to meet Clarisse in - Miranda looked at the clock and panicked - exactly one hour and forty one minutes. But in spite of freaking out, Miranda had the biggest smile on. She rarely smiled, she had forgotten how good it feels. 

"Mommy, are you okay?" 

Asked Cassidy walking into her mum's bedroom. 

"I am very okay, why do you ask?" 

Caroline following her twin sister came after her into large, bright bedroom. 

"Don't take us wrong mum, but you are like glowing since last night. Particularly since you had this mysterious call phone of yours." 

Miranda chuckled, drawing her girls into tight hug.

"I am meeting with a very dear friend of mine who I hadn't seen for 40 years, well until last night." 

Cassidy and Caroline looked at each other then back at her mother. 

"Wait. Yesterday you had only one meeting. And it was with someone called Clarisse."

"How could you possibly know that?!"

"Oh come on mum, we asked Andy, because you left in hurry and we were worried. Okay maybe more interested than wor... WAIT, NO NO NO, YOU COULD NOT HAVE POSSIBLY MET WITH THAT CLARISSE?!" 

Cassidy exclaimed, starting screaming. After few seconds Caroline understood what her sister had meant.

"Oh my god, are you friends with Queen Clarisse Renaldi? That pretty one from Genovia whose granddaughter is like our age?"

Miranda's heart was breaking. She wanted to scream and cry. Were they still, at least, friends? After all they had gone through together?

"Well, we used to be friends long time ago. Now well, our meeting will be about business mostly but I did ask her to come for a lunch here. We will be having break at some point, I suppose. " 

"oh god mother, we do love you. Now, will she bring Princess Amelia with her? Because we are dying to meet her and oh my god, this is so exciting, why aren't you exiting? Mum you are meeting a queen?" 

Miranda smiled, knowing that Clarisse would find twins adorable. The Dragon lady wasn't so much of a dragon after all. 

"Well, because I am actually kind of nervous. Last time we had seen each other, before yesterday, things got a little bit out of hands." 

"How bad, mum?" 

"Well, we didn't talk for 40 years. And jesus, how have, you two, grown up so fast!? Anyway, get your asses off here, I need to dress and make a few phone calls." 

Picking up her phone, she wrote short text saying: _"Can you bring Mia with you? She could stay with twins at mine? M.P x"_ Reply came after not more than minute: "Okay. C.R" Miranda smiled, making her way to her walk in wardrobe. 

 

**_Other side of San Francisco_  **

 

"I am not going." 

She said, sitting on the sofa in her office. 

"Yes, you are."

Joseph took her hand, making her stand up. 

"am not"

"Yes you are. Bloody stop arguing woman and let's get going!"

Joseph was losing his patience. He loved his queen like her sister. They had been the closest friends since the day she was married to Rupert. 

"Where are we going, gramma?"

Mia asked, kissing her grandmother's cheek.

"Well, I am taking you to meet someone." 

"Who is it?"

Who was Miranda? Suddenly she couldn't answer the question, though her heart was demanding the answer. 

"She is old friend of mine and her daughters are same age you are and they are dying to meet you." 

Yes, that was good answer. Diplomatic. 

"Someone I have heard of?" 

"Well, it is Miranda Pries.."

"WHAT ARE YOU SAYING GRANDMOTHER? Are you telling me, we are going to meet fashion queen and I look like potato sack? Even as invisible person as I am, gramma, knows who she is!"

Clarisse looked and Mia, smiling. 

"Well get dress then. I am going to let you do it just once, just because I know you will freak out otherwise."

Amelia looked puzzled, eyeing her grandmother. 

"Are you saying what I think you're saying, nana?" 

Queen's heart tighten, hearing this wonderful word. She thought she would never feel that joy and - in some point - happiness. "Nana" she always wanted to be just that nana, not Ice Queen everyone else thought she was. Clarisse was caring and loving, she used to be, but she could let herself relax, to be herself. Just Clarisse. Not Queen nor Mrs Renaldi. Just Clarisse without duties. Just Clarisse without sacrifices committed for the crown. 

"Yes darling. My wardrobe is opened. Just please hurry up, though Queen is never late, everyone is simply too early, this time I actually do not want to be late."

Mia gave silent screamed and ran out of her office, going straight to Her Majesty's suite. Clarisse smiled, feeling more nervous with every minute. 

"Do you have the jewels?" 

"But of course, Your Majesty. They are safe, already in the limo."

She sighed, standing up. 

"Okay, then let's be going. I will wait for Mia in the car." 

Straightening her skirt, Clarisse made her way out of the consulate, letting her mind wander.

 

_Clarisse Bonnet stood in her bedroom and watched as Miranda gathered her clothes and left in hurry. She could see tears going down her cheeks, which broke her heart in million pieces._

_"Please wait Miranda!"_

_She screamed, however brunette woman had left her alone. The sadness and disappointed were almost_ _unbearable. Little did she know, that she would never see her lovely little Mir again. Taking the cigarette between her lips, Clarisse had taken long drag, trying to ignore pain cumulating in her chest._

 

"Grandma, you're okay?" 

Clarisse smiled, nodding. 

"Of course, just memories came by. Anyway, you look perfect, Amelia." 

Teenager girl smiled to older woman, who sat next her, gently squeezing her hand. After 30 minutes of silent drive, they arrived at the address Miranda had sent to Charlotte. When Clarisse and Amelia got out of car, Joseph put hand on Queen's arm.

"Do not fuck it up Clarisse. After all, even you need a little bit of happiness, darling."

 He whispered into her ear, smiling. 

"Will try. Anyway, Miranda and I will be going on plan in an hour or so, will you wait in the limo?"

"Of course, Your Majesty. Though, please try not to kill her. Remember happiness." 

"Oh shush now!" 

Clarisse laughed and gently knocked to Miranda's door. Just like the other night all those years ago. 

"I am so happy you came!"

Miranda smiled, remembering as well. 

"Yes, me too." 

 


	5. It was duty.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The talk.

Both women stood looking at each other, exchanging cold smiles. 

"Amelia"

Clarisse said, not breaking the eye contact.

"Meet my friend Miranda."

She was looking into those beautiful green eyes, in which she got lost all those years ago. That moment everything stopped - as if the universe brought them back together. They could feel the tension, so suddenly, build between them. 

"Good afternoon, Princess." 

Miranda spoke, eyeing young girl standing next to Clarisse. She looked nice in the light pink dress. Clarisse, however, still in her usual black. She smirked, knowing she would change it that day. 

"Hello, Mrs Priestly."

Amelia smiled, feeling uncomfortable in the company of two older women. She looked at them both, wondering what actually may had happened between her grandmother and Miranda. She never had heard before Clarisse mentioning the Dragon Lady. 

"Please, call me Miranda."

After what seemed like eternity, Miranda smiled gesturing to both woman to come inside. As Clarisse had been passing by her, she gently touched her arm. 

"Not now. We will talk in the car." 

Miranda gently nodded, having wave of nausea washed over her body. Suddenly she had got extremely nervous and fidgety; she wanted to escape. They should not not be waking up the demons from their long and forgotten sleep. No, they should be left alone. They should be kept as a secret, almost as if they had never existed.

"Come along, girls are waiting."

Clarisse tried to smile, but then she felt her heart breaking into millions of pieces.All at once Miranda looked so small, so anxious and so sad. She would have never admitted it to everyone, but Clarisse knew that Miranda was fighting to keep her face straight. She did not look like confident woman whom everyone had feared. She looked lost. 

"We shall go for the interview after tea, then I suppose we will have enough time for the photoshoot. " 

Walking into the kitchen, Miranda made her way to the counter, not looking at Clarisse. 

"So you're like real queen with palace and crown and throne?" 

Both Cassidy and Caroline came after Mia into bright kitchen area, giggling. 

"Oh for god's sake Cassidy! Maybe hello first, at least?!" 

Mirana exclaimed, looking at Clarisse who smiled. 

"Sorry, mother. I am sorry, Your Majesty. Hello. I am Cassidy and that is Caroline."

Clarisse laughed, taking sip of her perfectly made tea. After all those years Miranda still was doing it the best. 

"It is okay, girls. Call me Clarisse. Trust me it is nice to hear time to time your real name, when you are called 'Your Majesty' or 'ma'am' for most of your life." 

Mia giggle, looking at her grandmother who was so much relaxed in company of Miranda than anyone else. Well maybe Joseph. 

"And yes, I am the real Queen with palace and crowns and throne."

Clarisse looked at Miranda, smiling. The girls and her looked so much alike. The same bright green eyes, perfect smile and this amazing thick hair, which Clarisse used to love so much. 

"Mama, can Mia stay here? With us?" 

Dragon Lady looked at her ex-lover, who only slightly nodded. 

"Of course. Just please be good. I would not like to get a phone call from one of Clarisse's guards, saying that you three have destroyed my house. 

"Oh come on, mum! We are always good!" 

Twins exclaimed, hugging her mother. 

"See that you are." 

Miranda kissed top of their heads, eyeing Clarisse who looked at her with the same love, she used to look at her. 

"Right, we should get going. We don't have much time, after all."

The both stood, taking their coats. 

"It is better if we didn't do the interview here. Trust me, they will know everything eventually and I am not sure if I am want them too, yet. My assistant has booked as a room on hotel, where we will find all the clothes. Photoshoot will take a place on a rooftop.." 

Clarisse looked at her terrified, trying to fight all the memories flying from the back of her mind. 

 

_"There you are!" Miranda rushed over Clarisse, throwing her arms around her neck._

_"I thought you were in the library. You are always there, when I can't find you."_

_She continued, kissing future queen soft lips. Slow and tender, as if she was touching butterflies wings. However after few seconds the kiss had become more heated and fanatic. Clarisse pinned Miranda's body to the wall behind her, tracing her lips with her tongue, silently asking for permission to enter. Miranda didn't hesitate but move her hands into Clarisse's hair, gently tagging._

_"I wanted to be alone for a bit."_

_She said, moving her lips to Miranda's neck._

_"Though, I don't anymore."_

_She chuckled, gently biting soft skin on her lover's collarbone._

_"Oh do tell me about it."_

_Miranda laughed but shortly after soft moan escaped her parted lips, when Clarisse's hand move to her tigh._

_"Maybe later, honey."_

_Purring into her ear, she very slowly tag on waistband of Miranda's lacy knickers, pushing them down her shapely legs._

 

"Yup, that's okay with me." 

Smiling Clarisse stepped out of the house. Both women didn't know how to act around each other nor what to actually say. So many things had changed and happened between them to forget the past and move on; no matter how hard they would be trying. 

"Your Majesty?" 

Joseph stood outside the limo, looking at women who most certainly did not want to be near each other. 

"She will give you the address." 

Clarisse's ice voice made Miranda shiver. Only then had she realised that she was the reason why Queen changed into heartless and emotionless person. She passed piece of paper to Joseph then climbed into the limousine, next to her majesty. As soon as she sat down, Clarisse put the private mode on. 

"I am sorry." 

"And what exactly are you sorry for, Miranda?" 

She looked at Miranda and streams of hot tears ran down her facer. Miranda, however, couldn't take it. Clarisse's tears had been breaking her heart and all she wanted to do was hold her. Hold her tight and and kiss the perfect forehead of hers, whispering sweet nothings into her ear. 

"For walking away and for the person you have become because of me." 

"Don't be silly, Miranda." 

Clarisse snapped, looking straight into her eyes.

"It would have happened sooner or later. No one have an idea how does it feel to be a royal. It is far from fairytale, hell that has nothing to do with happiness. It is duty. Always duty. Nothing more than that. There are no such feeling as love or even friendship. There is loneliness, there is sadness and there is goddamn duty. Do you really think I wanted to get married? Person as independent as I used to be? Do you think I wanted to go away and leave London? Oh no, that most certainly was not my dream. I had my own dreams, my own plans, my life."

Lonely tears went down her cheek, as she continued talking. 

"But in Genovia by that time I had nothing to say. I was 25, to my parents I was still a child. I had to be the person who my parents wanted me to be. Bloody Queen of Genovia. Since forty years I haven't been happy, almost all of my marriage Only my two sweet and perfect boys, they made me get through it, they made me stay with Rupert. I wanted to escape, to be free again but then again - goddamn duty. Besides so called prime and perfect King had been cheating on me for at least 30 years. Well as far as I know, and in the palace even walls have the ears and eyes. It is not like even mind though, I could not care less. I did not love him nor did he love me. But his sons knew about his affairs, they saw him with one of those young and thin girls you love so much."

She smirked, looking into the window. 

"That had broken my heart. They blamed me for such long time, saying that I was too cold for him, little did they know how awful Rupert could be when he got angry. So before you decide you still hate me, because I had duty to my country and I could not do anything to stay, remember I did not have a choice." 

Clarisse's eyes were closed only tears were slipping down her pale face, making her make-up look fairly bad. 

"I have never hated you." 

Miranda's cold voice broke the silence, causing Queen to look at her with her piercing blue eyes. 

"I hated the idea of losing you. I hated the fact that I would never see you again, not in the same way that I used to seeing you every morning after you woke up. I don't deny it, it has made me cold - but I was hurt. Hurt very badly. That one moment, that one kiss had broken my heart. I loved you, very much, as a matter of fact and I do know you loved me too. I saw that in your eyes. I saw something I could never find in them when you looked at Rupert, when you were married. 

Clarisse sighed, looking down at the black leather seat. Their hands were close - too close perhaps. She could feel Miranda's heart beats in her chest when they hands had touched. 

"Yes, I did love you once." 

 _'And I still love you...'_ Clarisse thought to herself, when Miranda squeezed her fingers. 

 

 


	6. How could she not?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Let the old demons come.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Italics for thoughts and interview questions. 
> 
> Thank you reading, guys!

_Why was Amelia kept as, let me quote, "royal secret"?_

"Quite obvious, isn't it? My boys never had a normal childhood. They could never just go and play with their friends. We did not want the same future for Amelia. She deserved peace and happiness. Being a royal means sacrifices. And as it is already known now, Philippe did marry Helen in secret. Neither Rupert nor I knew about it, until Amelia was 3 months old." 

_Have you ever met her before coming to San Francisco?_

"No and I did promise I would not do it. I was meant to wait to meet her and tell her when she will be 18. Unfortunately som..." 

Clarisse voices broke and tears ran down her face. Every thought about her dead son was breaking her heart. It was only three months and she felt as if Joseph had told her only the day before. 

"Something has happened, my beloved son, Prince Philippe, died in the car accident. His brother, Pierre, abdicated which makes Amelia next person in line to the crown. 

_What if Amelia decides to reject her title?_

"Then I believe after I died, Renaldi line will die as well." 

_Is royal life fairytale like everyone likes to believe?_

"It is mostly duty." 

_What about feelings?_

"Miranda you are crossing the damn fine line, you know exactly I don't want to lie and, oh come on, how am I suppose to answer it?" 

Clarisse exclaimed, standing up and walking to the windowsill. 

"Okay, let's have a break. We can always do that over phone, I suppose."

Leaving her pen on the coffee table, Miranda moved to stand next to Clarisse.

"Was it really that bad?" 

Queen looked at her, trying to smile. 

"Worse than you can imagine. Though as I read your life wasn't fairytale either."

"Nope, it wasn't. I gave my girls quite a hell with potential fathers, I suppose. I don't know why. Maybe because I didn't want to be alone? I know who I am, Clarisse. I have stronger personality than most of them and I just can't be alone, I can't bare watching them leaving, so that's what I do. It's what I am good at. Turning around and walking away, because I can."

 She sighed, putting cigarette between her red lips. 

"You never smoked before." 

Clarisse looked at her, taking one for herself from the packet. 

"I have started that night. Felt closer to you, I guess." 

Queen's heart tighten and she could feel how it started beating faster and faster, making her blood boil. She was, suddenly, so aware of woman who stood next to her and all she wanted was to kiss her. Kiss her like she used to, touch her like she used to, love her they way she used to. She swallowed, hard then took a long drag of her cigarette. 

"Well that was bloody damn stupid, wasn't it?" 

"No, it wasn't the smartest idea of mine."

"Nope, not at all, darl..."

Clarisse bite her tongue when red blush crept on her face. How could she let that happen? One word but at the same time, for them, it meant the world. She felt sad; sad because she couldn't let Miranda know that silver haired woman still hold her heart tight in her hands, she still got the key, she still owned it - after all those years. 

"Shall we continue the interview or shall we start the photoshoot? Everyone is ready, just waiting for you." 

Miranda tried her best to ignore Queen's comment. She did not want to hear that, no. Not yet, when they were standing precipice of losing each other again. 

"Let's continue the interview. I bet I'd be too tired and moody to answer the questions later." 

"Oh yes, I forgot about that. Yes, you probably would be, making both mine and Nigel work living hell." 

Clarisse chuckled, sitting down on the comfortable coach. 

"Yup, I would do it. I wonder how Joseph and Charlotte are keeping up with me. I am a nightmare after signing papers all day." 

Minerva looked at her, smiling. Years ago she knew how to make Clarisse relaxed, she knew where to touch, where to kiss and what to say. She still had known it. Biting her lips, she looked down on her lap. Thousands of butterflies were flying around her stomach, making Miranda blush. 

"I know what you're thinking about and you really should stop it, Mira." 

And there she was, she said. The nickname no one else dared using. 

"Well, I am most certainly no sorry. You need to admit it had worked all those years ago when your temperament got in a way..." 

Rolling her eyes, Clarisse took sip of her tea. 

"Do shut up, will you? And let's continue that interview on yours, I am hungry." 

"Okay, mother." 

Clarisse laughed, feeling as if her best friend came back to her. She felt happy, but also incredible sad. Did she want Miranda back in her life? Did she want to be friends with her again? Did she want something more than just being friends? Millions of questions flew around her mind, bringing waves of nausea. 

_How have you dealt with lost?_

"I haven't." 

_Your marriage was arranged, who did Kind Rupert and you get to know each other?_

"King Rupert 'may her rest in peace' was older than me by 5 years. It wasn't much, which is surprising. I met him when we both were at Unversity. On my first year. I was the only girl by that time who wasn't gasping nor fainting around him. Of course we were both true Genovian and I tried to ignore him as long as I could. As many can remember I was not a party girl and I did like to read. I always was hiding in library when I wanted to be alone or, as a matter of fact, on the roof. We met there once. I told him to get away from me, because I wanted to be alone, besides he had all those girls down there. He tried to kiss me and all I remember was slapping him. Though after years when we met again we did laugh at this situation. You should have seen his face when his mother, Queen Victoria, showed him that I am one of the candidate for future Queen. Actually, as he had told me later, he never had been thinking long about his decision. He had chosen me, because he knew I would be able to deal with Parliament and annoying people. Well never had he been wrong, had he?" 

Clarisse smiled. After all they had been friends, but he was not happy. Nor was she. 

_Did you love each other?_

"Very much, as a matter of fact. However, we never had been in love with each other. It wasn't romantic love. We were friends, very close ones. He knew a lot about me that many people hadn't had any idea. I knew everything about him. We did complement each other, even though there never had been any sparks or so called chemistry. We had a duty and we had a friendship which last for 40 years until he passed away." 

_Have you ever missed your life? Life where you didn't have to be a Queen nor did you have to performs duties and just be yourself?_

"People need to understand that being in Royal family isn't always fun. Of course there are balls and amazing dinners or concerts but I seriously don't remember what was the last time I have gone shopping myself. Just me without someone who is standing next to me, making sure no one is in fitting room. Most of designers, those who I do love, have my sizes and they send me things. I don't even remember when I sat on the front seat actually! After some time it is quite tiring, I am afraid. Walls have ears and eyes, someone is always watching you so you can't let yourself, shall we call, lose it, because for sure someone will be there standing with camera to take a photo in the most improper moment of yours ever. I do miss it, every day. I miss the freedom but I love Genovia with all my heart. I love the people and I most certainly would die for them." 

_Genovia is proud to have a Queen as strong as you are. Many do love you._

"And many do hate me." 

_The Ice Queen, where did that come from?_

 "Dragon Lady? Where that one came from, Mrs Priestly?" 

Miranda smiled, looking in the most beautiful blue eyes she had ever seen in her all life.

"Though I believe we should thank members of Parliament with whom I didn't want to dance." 

Both women laughed, ignoring the tension which had been building between them since they sat down - this time- next to each other on the sofa. 

_So, does the Ice Queen of Genovia and my oldest friend reads Runway?_

Clarisse's heartbeats quickened when Miranda touched her arm. Slowly at first, making lazy circles on her uncovered skin.

"I believe the Ice Queen of Genovia and your oldest friend does read the Runway." 

"Oh, I knew that already. After all she is wearing the black dress I loved so much." 

"Of course she does. How could she not?"

Clarisses bite her lower lip not to let the moan escape. Miranda's cold fingers were making shiver ran down Queen's spine. Parting her lips, she could not deny it anymore; Clarisse moaned, making both woman gasped. With her eyes closed, she turned her head to look at Miranda. Little did she know, how close the younger woman was. Their lips touched, but neither of them pulled away nor stopped the kiss. Oh no, how could they? It felt too perfect, too right. The electricity between them passed the universe, making everything froze in that moment. Nothing matter to them anymore, only soft kisses. As soft as if their lips were made of the finest lace; as if they touched butterflies' wings with every little moan. Clarisse moved her arms around Miranda's waist making her sit on her lap, like she used to all those years ago. She smiled between every little kiss, slowly making her way down younger woman sides. Miranda gasped into her mouth, when she felt Clarisse's hand under the hem of her perfectly cut navy blue skirt. She softly touched uncovered skin above lacy complections of Miranda's black stockings. _Always the Lady_ she thought, tagging on her garters attached straps. Miranda, however, was doing everything not to melt into older women touch. So perfect, so gentle, so right. She traced Clarisse's lower lip with her tongue, silently asking for permission to enter. Parting her lips, Queen welcomed unforgotten touch, moaning. They were lost. Lost in each other the same way they had been lost all those years ago, when neither of them had silver hair and perfect wrinkles. And they did love each other, they same way they loved 40 years ago. Silently said without words, not yet voiced. But they knew - they knew they have the feeling back. Because after 40 years they had never stopped, not for a moment. 

After what seemed like eternity soft knocking was heard in a room on the top floor of Four Season hotel. Neither of them ready yet to let go, neither of them wanted to, neither of them even tried. 

"Miranda, it's me Nigel. It's getting late, maybe it's time for the photoshoot?" 

Leaning her forehead on Clarisse shoulder, Miranda sighed. 

"I do hate him."

 


	7. Let her take care of you.

"Can we ask you a question?" 

Amelia smiled, looking at twins. 

"Yea, shoot." 

"Do you know what happen between them? I mean mother has never mentioned Clarisse before and we would know about her, we know about all of her friends, though she has loads of shit and fake ones. We thought maybe you'd know something?" 

"Damn it, I thought you would tell me! I know nothing. Besides I only met her like two weeks ago. She just said that Miranda is her old friend. What about your mum, what did she say about gramma?" 

"She said that Clarisse is her oldest friend and they hadn't seen each other 40 years until yesterday. Which Uni your grandmother was at?" 

"Oxford, duh. Political science and History of Art." 

"I fucking knew it!" 

Caroline exclaimed, looking at both Mia and her twin sister. 

"Look, your grandmother is older than our mother but not that much. They must had been at uni together, that would explain everything. They both studied Political Science and History or Art and when we asked her how bad it was between them, mum said pretty damn bad."

"Okay that could do but it does not explain what have happened. I mean why hadn't they talked with each other and why Miranda now wants to talk with gramma?" 

"I believe it's about your dad's death and King Rupert passing." 

Suddenly Amelia felt sad, like she was missing big part of her life she would never get to know. 

"I thought as much. Actually..."

Mia's eyes twinkled and smirked appeared on her face.

"We do know that face and we are one hundred percent in your plan Mia." 

"I knew it! First of all we need to see your mum's old photos. When she was like 18 maybe 20 and we do need to go on the Internet. I might have an idea how to start this." 

Mia giggled. 

"Okay, but, I know it sounds stupid and silly and it is possibly the most unlike thing ever, but what if they were together? I mean as a couple?"

"You are right Cass, that does sound silly and stupid. Have you seen Clarisse? Prim and proper lady who, I believe is damn conservatists." 

"Yeah, you are right, that was silly. Still though, have you seen how they looked at each other? I mean, have you felt the tension?" 

Mia looked puzzled. What if that was true? What if her grandmother and Miranda were and item? Then why would Clarisse married King Rupert? Questions ran through her mind, making young girl gasped. 

"Listen to me, guys. Whatever we will discover we can't let anyone know. Not even them, not until we are sure as damn. Look, Miranda is basically fashion Queen and it will ruin her, so will you. And my grandmother is real Queen of real country with people who are just waiting for her to make a mistake, they want her crown. No, they want my crown." 

She felt proud of herself, she felt - first time since meeting Clarisse - that she could do it, that she could rule the country. She didn't feel like invisible person on whom people used to sat. No, not anymore. She felt confident and strong, like a real princess she was meant to be. 

"DUH! Though I don't think I would mind mama being with Clarisse. After all she seems to be pretty cool."

"Yeah, she is pretty cool. You should have seen how she can sass people, it is priceless!" 

Mia laughed along with twins. 

"And she is beautiful." 

Caroline smiled and took a long sip of her tea.

 

_**Four Season Hotel, San Francisco** _

 

"You know that it should not have happened, Miranda?" 

Of course it shouldn't, it was wrong. Demons of the past should be asleep not woken up. They are monsters; terrifying and horrible monsters, only causing pain and sadness. 

"I am aware of it" 

Miranda's voice suddenly became colder, as it used to be when they spoke on the phone the day before. 

"I will get change. I don't want people waiting up for me."

Clarisse glanced at the clock, smiling, 

"For too long." 

"Yeah, clothes and underwear are laid in the bedroom. Take your time and remove make-up. Someone will come around in few minutes to help you." 

Miranda walked to the door, opening it.

"Geeez, I thought you two are dead." 

Nigel joked, looking at really sad looking Miranda. And then it hit him. Suddenly he realized why Miranda wanted to the interview by herself - something she had never done because she was too tired to deal with people - and why she wanted to be alone with Clarisse. He looked at her and her sad green eyes, in which he could see tears. Miranda Priestly crying. After all even the Dragon Lady wasn't so afraid of salty water. 

"Where is she?"

He asked, when she looked at her trembling hands. 

"Bedroom, changing. I believe it will be better if you checked on her. I am going up to face the crowd. How many people are there?"

"Only 10. We thought it would be the best. As I heard she respects her privacy."

Miranda smirked, trying to stop her tears. 

"More than you can imagine. Anyway will you take care of her make-up? I do know you can do it, Nigel." 

"Duh." 

He answered, walking towards closed bedroom doors. Before knocking he had hesitated, hearing quiet sobbing.

"Your Majesty? It's me, Nigel. I am meant to help you a little and do your make up?"

He could hear moving around the room before the door opened.

"Come in, I am just about to put the dress on."

She didn't bother to smile, she didn't even care if tears were running freely down her face. She did something too wrong, she hurt and got hurt, because of her own stupidness. 

"Permission to speak freely, ma'am?" 

Confused Clarisse looked at Nigel who stood with the pair of the finest high heels she had even seen in her life. 

"Zip me up and speak."

Turning around, she faces the big mirror. Last time she had looked so sad was that night when she was told that Philippe was dead. 

"I am her closest friend. The idea of friend she needed me to be. I have always been there for her and I know that she wasn't cold before. Something had changed her." 

"No, she wasn't cold. Quite the opposite, I am afraid." 

"Miranda never told me about you nor her relationship with you. But when she heard that you are in San Francisco, now when we are here, I don't think I have ever seen her so happy, sad and frighten at the same time, before."

He fasten, gently, the zipper and adjust its fabric. 

"She does care about you, Your Majesty." 

Clarisse sighed, closing her eyes. She was tired. Her emotions were on rollercoaster; once up and then significantly downwards. 

"And that's what horrified me the most. I did broke her heart once. I don't want to do this again." 

"Then don't, ma'am." 

Nigel sat her down at her dresser, turning Clarisse towards him. 

"It's not as easy as you think, Nigel. Do you have any idea what people would say? I am the queen and if Mia refused to be a princess, I would bloody well destroyed my country. The reason Miranda is the person she is today is because of me. It is because I had to leave. I had to get married. I left her, do you understand? I did broke her heart and if that happens again, I would never forgive myself. I love her too much for that." 

"Aha, so you do admit, you love her?" 

Clarisse sighed, empting glass of wine she had earlier poured herself. 

"Yes, I do. Quite a lot actually. I don't think I ever stopped, I am afraid. And having her back in my life hurts. All of the old wounds are opening. I don't even think I still can show one how I love or how I feel but coldness. I am scared of it. I can't show Mia how much I love her, I don't know how. Not anymore. I couldn't show Rupert, and god help me I tried. I think I have given up at some point. After Philippe's death I closed even more and letting Miranda in would mean something and I am not sure if I am ready for that step yet." 

She let herself cry, when Nigel gently hold her, as if she was made of the finest and delicate china. Little doll, vulnerable and weak. Not the same person people could see every day on television. 

"Maybe it is time you let yourself be happy again? You got through quite a lot, Clarisse. Let her in, let her take care of you. She needs it as much as you do, darling. She needs to find love again, the happiness before she retires, because otherwise my job will be living hell. Mind you, it already is. Dealing with hormonal women on daily base." 

Clarisse chuckled, brushing her face away. 

"Let's make the goddess you already are shine again."

From behind the door to bedroom, Miranda smiled. _She does love me, that's all that matters,_ she thought to herself when lonely tears of joy flowed down her cheeks. 


	8. Rissie?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Takes two to love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Italics for retrospection.

Opening her eyes Clarisse felt dull pain in her head. Pounding thoughts and blur images were running through her mind.  _Where am I?_  She asked herself, smoothing satin cover over her stomach. Feeling confused she looked down her body, only to realise that she was naked. She never slept naked, unless... Realisation hit her, making her gasp out loud.  _That could not be true, that did not happen._  Like matra she repeated those words over and over again, turning her head to see asleep Miranda. She got older; beautiful wrinkles could be seen on her angelic looking face and divine cleavage, but she hadn't changed a bit. She looked so peaceful and happy while she was asleep. Though all Clarisse wanted to do was screaming that they let each other give that piece of heaven they used to share, she couldn't say a word. She was looking at her silver her friend. Was that a good term for Miranda? Who was silver haired woman with whom she had shared the greatest memories and happiness? 

"How long have you been awake?" 

Her husky and sleepy voice broke in to Clarisse's mind. 

"Long enough, I suppose." 

She answered, gripping cover a little tighter around herself. Deep blush crept over her body, trying to remember what exactly did happen between Miranda and herself. 

 

~*~ 

_"Miranda?"_

_Everyone watched Queen of Genovia slipping into her mask. She looked confident, prim and beautiful. More beautiful than ever. Miranda smiled, seeing how Rissie's eyes sparkled every time someone said she did look perfect. Maybe she was a queen but most certainly she was not used to being complemented._

_"Yes?"_

_Miranda answered looking at Nigel who suddenly looked quite lost._

_"She does look lovely but I was thinking...."_

_"I know what you mean. I was considering it earlier  and I am not sure she would agree. She knows she owns a power  -  over well mostly everybody - but I am not sure she is confident enough to show a little bit of her body."_

_"I would have thought that I am not speaking to Miranda Priestly who always gets what she wants."_

_He smirked, looking in the most terrifying green eyes one could have seen._

_"It is different. She just lost her child and.. and husband. I am not quite sure if it'd be appropriate actually. But it does look quite, erm boring, I am afraid."_

_Both of them didn't realise that the Queen herself was standing close by._

_"Yes, it is boring."_

_Clarisse said, looking at both Miranda and Nigel._

_"It is fine, I mean I always look prim and prop but this is way too boring for magazine with as huge reputation as Runway. Besides don't you think that sometimes - even I -  do want to escape? Don't get me wrong, I am very private person, as everybody knows that, but as I already said I would do this damn photoshoot, I don't see any problem to, as Nigel might have put it earlier, loosen my buttons a little bit. "_

_"Are you sure?"_

_"I have always been doing what is good for everybody else. Maybe it is something I need. Last year was terrible and I am sure I can't go on living in that world of mine , when most certainly I keep forgetting that despite being Queen, I am also a woman, whom I do try ignore. Possibility that certain members of parliament will look at me differently and as if I have lost my dignity along with my mind is huge and frankly speaking, my dear, I think I don't care that much anymore. Showing of a little bit of chest hasn't been a cause of death yet and if I will be accused of disgrace - because of course I will be, by those sexists who are waiting for my mistake - think about all those women who actually are reading your magazine."  
_

_Clarisse smiled, making her way inside._

_"That was quite something, Priestly. Go after her and don't fuck it up."_

_Miranda looked at Nigel with the most perfect twinkle in her eyes._

_"Have I ever fucked up something before, Nigel?"_

_"Yes, you did. Forty years ago, you didn't let certain lady explain yourself."_

_"How do y..."_

_"We talked and don't play stupid, Miranda. You may be a Dragon Lady but I am not afraid, besides you were eavesdropping."_

_"Maybe I was maybe I wasn't."_

_Having said that Miranda turned around on her heel, going down the corridor to the hotel room. Hotel room in which only couple of hours ago Clarisse was tracing her lips with her tongue and stroking her thighs with those perfect hands of  hers; always so delicate, feminine with the most perfect manicure. Suddenly Miranda felt as she used to feel every time she was near Clarisse. She felt hot, wet wanting, as if nothing else matter to the world. Only Clarisse, herself and the needs of their bodies and souls. Standing in front of the door, Miranda knocked softly. She did try her best to stay calm, to hide her emotions - and hormones - under perfectly made iron mask, she wore every day. Her eyes, however, wouldn't have lied to anybody; and most certainly not to Clarisse. Usual bright green changed into the deepest emerald. Her breathing was shallow and unsteady. oh how much she wanted her Clarisse._

_"Hello"_

_Queen simply said, opening the door._

_"Hello yourself, came to ask in case you may need some help."_

_Clarisse looked at her and her eyes which spoke more than thousands words._

_"Well that's nice of you but Nigel did a great job and left everything in the wardrobe for me. Though you can wait, if you like. I shall not be long."_

_She felt uncomfortable being so close to Miranda after what  happened few hours back. She did love kissing her, she did love the fire woken by Miranda but she indeed felt frightened._

_"Okay"_

_It was all Miranda said, when Clarisse disappeared behind slightly ajar bedroom doors. Not being able to help herself, Miranda looked through the slot and her heart skipped faster. Clarisse's leg was stretched before her when her delicate fingers were smoothing silky fabric of her stockings. Then she clipped them to her lacy garter belt. She looked stunning, Miranda thought feeling how her lips became dry. Slipping on her exorbitantly high high heels, Clarisse very slowly buttoned up her black blouse. She left three first buttons undone. Feeling Miranda's gaze at her body, Clarisse deliberately pull her red - very tight - skirt up her slim and shapely legs._

_"Zip up"_

_Clarisse whispered, turning her back to Miranda. She came gradually and lazily towards Queen's body.  Putting her palms on Clarisse's hips, she pulled her closer. Miranda's lips quickly found soft spot on Clarisse's neck. She kissed it gently, making the other woman shiver under her gentle touch. Very slowly she zipped her skirt, leaving trail of wet kisses on her exposed neck._

_"Where is your crown, Your Majesty?"_

_She spoke in Clarisse's ear, watching as goosebump appeared on her skin._

_"On the table."_

_She answered, looking at Miranda who took her - perfect and very rich - crown. Clarisse bent her knees, when Miranda put jewels on her head. She looked even more stunning now, Priestly thought. Ruby stones fit amazingly with her outfit. As soon as the heavy object touched her body, she could feel the pressure of duty she had held over the years._

_"You do look beautiful, Your Majesty."_

_Clarisse blushed, biting her bottom lips. She wanted nothing more than pin Miranda to the wall and ravish her body._

_"We should go...Though the Queen is never late but everybody is simply too early, I do not like being snobbish old lady."_

_Putting some distance between them, Clarisse turned around, walking out of the room._

_Her mind was on fire, as was her skin. She could feel every nerve in her body, every little part of it - she became more aware of the woman who had held her heart for forty one years. Every feeling she used to felt, came back with double impact. She wanted Miranda. And she wanted her badly. When her foot stood on the rooftop, everyone gasped. While Queen of Genovia was bloody stunning and could steal anybody's heart, mind, body and soul, Clarisse Renaldi the woman took of that moment. She was sensual and she was sexy - and more important she suddenly knew it. Flirtatious smile appeared on her face when after few short minutes the photoshoot  began._

 

_After what seemed like ages to everyone, especially to Clarisse, the photo session was over. Finally, she said quietly, taking off her heels. Maybe she was a Queen, but even standing in those awful high shoes made her feet sore._

_"Your Majesty? Would you like to join me and Miranda for dinner? It is our tradition to celebrate after every session."_

_Nigel smiled sweetly to her and she hesitated, knowing that she really was ought go back to the consulate._

_"It is late, Nigel. I'd love to but I am not sure my Head of Security will be please about it."_

_"Actually.."_

_Nigel winked at her and there was a huge cheeky grin on his face._

_"I actually did talk to him for a bit and we decided that dinner is in order and..."_

_"You talked with him about things, didn't you Nigel?"_

_"I have no idea what are you talking about, You Majesty."_

_"Very well then, lead the way."_

_She smiled, taking his arm as he escorted her to the hotel restaurant._

_"Does she know I am going to join?"_

_"Nope."_

_"So that you know, you are in trouble."_

_"I really don't care much, Clarisse. I saw the way she looked at you. She does love you and believe me, I do know her well. Almost as well as Joseph knows you, ma'am."_

_Clarisse sighed, when they stepped in the elevator._

_"How long have you knows her, Nigel?"_

_"40 years, Madam. We met shortly after, shall we say, break up. I didn't know about you for a long time though. Actually, she has never told me about you. I saw her, however, few days ago when she saw you on telly. I don't think she has ever been so sad and happy at the same time and you know her, she does have that nickname for a reason. She has never showed her emotions, after that night, to no one but me. Not even her husbands. They tried, but always work and in some poin duty. Only twins have saved her from being miserable old and very very rude bitch. Mind you she already is sometimes, but I can understand. You and her are really much alike."_

_They arrived at the lobby where her guards bow slightly, seeing her walking past them. Nigels' words were rumbling through her mind. She wanted to make everything between Miranda and herself right, she wanted to feel loved and happy again but at the same time - duty. Bloody duty had always been the biggest obstacle of her life._

_"Aren't you tired of being watched all the time, Madam?"_

_"You have no idea."_

_They laughed, walking through the crowds in the restaurant. People were looking at her - she was used to that - but it became, suddenly, very uncomfortable. They looked at her with pity and in the most obnoxious way._

_"Clarisse?"_

_Miranda looked at her surprised._

_"What are you doing here?"_

_Queen only smiled and silently thanked Nigel for her glass filled with burgundy coloured wine._

_"I was told that about the custom of your and Nigel's. He was kind enough to ask if I wanted to join in."_

_She smiled, taking long sip of her drink. She could feel Miranda's fingers slowly stroking her hand under the table. She was not sure at all if that dinner was a good idea, but nevertheless she squeezed Miranda's fingers, never letting it go off from her lap._

 

_After two bottles of wine, spectacular dinner and cup of her favorite tea, Clarisse was most certainly drunk. She did not remember the last time she felt dizzy and had the giggle for over all night. But she felt happy, she felt loved and needed. Of course she was needed by all of Genovian but as woman she felt lonely, sad and lost in the crowds. Part of her was missing - until now. She felt oddly at home. Finding herself falling asleep on the table, she looked at Miranda - who as a matter of fact did not look better than herself. She smiled, slowly standing up. Whole world was spinning around her._

_"I may call it a night, I am afraid. I am too tired to wait for the car to take me back to consulate."_

_Gathering her things, he walked over to Nigel._

_"Thank you for the invitation. It really was very pleasant evening."_

_He bowed gently, taking her hand. He kissed it and smiled._

_"The pleasure was all mine."_

_Clarisse giggled - oh how drunk and lightheaded she felt._

_"Thank you for your company, Miranda. It was really lovely."_

_Queen smiled, making her way out of the restaurant._

_"And what are you still doing here, Priestly?"_

_"What?!"_

_She answered, looking slightly confused._

_"Jezzz woman, it is really hard to be in the same room with you two. The tension is unbearable. Move that beautiful ass of yours and go after her! She does want it as much as you do, trust me Miranda."_

_She was torn. She had no idea what to do. What if Clarisse didn't want her anymore? What if she would make fool of herself?_

_"Miranda, go!"_

_Nigel exclaimed, watching as something snapped in Miranda._

_"God, I love her."_

_She finally said, looking at the door in which Clarisse just disappeared._

_"Go."_

_He said again and she stood up, almost running between tabled and people who looked more than surprised._

_"Rissie?"_

_She called, looking towards the love of her life. Clarisse smiled to herself, turning around._

_"Would you care to join me for a nightcup, Miranda? I feel as if I could use a cut of steaming tea with just a little tiny bit of milk."_

_Miranda let the breath she didn't realise she was holding._

_"But of course, Your Majesty. It would be my pleasure."_

_They walked in silent to Clarisse's room. The air between them was thicker with every step they take; tension almost unbearable. Their hearts were beating in the same, the same passion was building deep in their bodies. She opened the door with shaking hands, letting Miranda in first. As soon as she stopped in, silver haired woman pinned her to the wall, taking Clarisse's breath away. It was exactly what she missed - the passion, the fire they had shared, the kisses and touches. She had missed  Miranda with every bit of her being._

_Miranda captured Clarisse's mouth, tracing her tongue on her perfectly rounded lips._

_"I do want you."_

_Clarisse managed to say between heated kissed and Miranda's hands all over her body. She felt her fingers on smooth skin on her stomach. How did she managed to get her out of her blouse, she was still wondering. But all that matter that minute was to feel. It is all she craved for last 40 or something years. Clarisse pushed gently on Miranda's shoulders, taking her hand in hers. Still kissing, she walked with her towards the King's size bed in the centre of the room. She sat on the edge, so that Miranda was standing between her parted legs - the same way she used to stand all those years ago. Looking straight into green dark eyes, Clarisse undone buttons of Miranda's creamy blouse. Her fingers were followed by her soft lips, kissing every inch of her exposed skin._

_"Oh god, I have missed you so badly."_

_Miranda moaned, when Clarisse closed her mouth around her taut nipple._

_"Really missed you."_

_She kept saying, pushing Queen's head towards her skin. She wanted - no, she needed - to be to her as close as possible. Clarisse's hand was stroking her inner thigh, making Miranda gasp._

_"You really want me to bed you, don't you darling?"_

_"For the old tame's sake, Mira."_

_She giggles, when she felt herself being pushed on the bed and Miranda straddled her hips._

_"There is one more thing of the old time's sake, my love."_

_Clarisse blushed, realizing that sleeping was the last thing on her mind._

_"And what that may be?"_

_She asked, being - as she used to be - cheeky little minx. But she was he minx. She was Miranda's minx. She always had and always be. She could feel Miranda's kisses going downwards. With every touch and every lick, one of her clothing was removed. Her lips were on her collarbone, making her way towards her breasts and stomach._

_"Oh god"_

_Clarisse whispered, when Miranda undone her lacy bra. She was, then, only lying in front of her in underwear, garter belt and stockings. She looked sexy and - which was surprising for Clarisse - she felt sexy, she felt wanted and, despite her aga, wet. Wet and wanton. When Miranda's lips closed around her nipples, she gasped, clutching sheets in her hands. Miranda only grimmed at her, going with her kisses down. She slowly parted Clarisse's legs and kissed her milky colour thighs. Leaning on her elbows, Clarisse was able to look in her lover's eyes which were filled with passion, lust, desire - and most importantly - love. Miranda, very slowly, took of her knickers, kissing every bit of her exposed skin._

_"Rissie?"_

_She asked after a second, making Clarisse look at her._

_"You are beautiful."_

_With those words her mouth closed around Clarisse's clit._

 

_~*~_

"Do you regret what happened last night?" 

Miranda, asked looking at confused Queen. 

"No" 

She simply said and kissed her. 

"Good."

Miranda smiled, looking into frightened blue eyes. 

"But we need to talk about it. And no matter how much I would like to stay...

"I know"

Miranda said. 

"Duty always comes first." 

 


	9. Two can play a game.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two, indeed, can play a game.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Italics for retrospection.  
> As bloody always. And thank you loads for kudos and comments. :)

 

_It couldn't be happening again, surely it wasn't true, Miranda kept telling herself. Those words like matra in her mind, driving her crazy. They were standing in the middle of Genovian Consulate garden, surrendered by complete silence, facing each other._

_"What do you mean?"_

_Miranda, yes the Dragon Lady herself, had tears in those perfect emerald eyes. She did not want to lose her again._

_"I mean exactly what you've heard...."_

_Clarisse knew what her friend - so to speak - was thinking. That happened already, forty or so years ago the same situation took place in the middle of Clarisse's bedroom._

_"Well at least you bloody well could tell me earlier, couldn't you?"_

_"I.."_

_She started, avoiding Miranda's gaze._

_"I tried, god help me I did. But, Miranda, you knew it was coming. Sooner or later, it would have happened. Besides, for heaven's sake, look at us! That should not have happened. Fling, affair, call it whichever, but you know that. We are too important for that, Miranda."_

_"I can't believe you are doing it again. Playing on that damn duty card. Is it everything you care for? Where is she? Where is my Clarisse?"_

_Miranda couldn't stopped her anger, it was overwhelming her. It could not be happening again._

_"She is long gone. You know that. And I will alway put duty over everything."_

_"Of course, I bet you'd do it even over Amelia."_

_Clarisse eyes widen._

_"You have already done that, haven't you Clarisse? You used that girl to save your ass and to remain monarch? I can't believe it."_

_"For god's sake! I did it because otherwise Von Tokens would take my crown. Amelia's crown for that matter. I did not have a choice."_

_"Don't be ridiculous Clarisse, everyone has choice. You know that very well."_

_"Well I do not have a choice. I did not have this forty years ago and I do not have it now when I say I am leaving."_

_"Oh yes, I can't believe I let myself believed that all this meant something. Something important for you. But then aren't you the Ice Queen? You never explain anything nor have a choice. Always duty. Always the best excuse."_

_"For Christ's sake, we really are going through this again? "_

_Clarisse exclaimed._

_"Apparently yes."_

_"Of course, it's what you do best, just walking always when things aren't going the way you want them."_

_Miranda wasn't listening anymore. And she was gone._ _Clarisse didn't move. How could she? Her pride was too hurt for that. Queen never goes after anyone, but Clarisse? Clarisse should have gone...._

* * *

**_Four months later, New York_ **

 

"And you are who?" 

Young girl looked at woman in her mid sixties. She was elegant and very sophisticated. Her dress - black and very fashionable - fit her perfectly, showing all of her womanly curves. Her eyes, however - piercing blue and bright - were the center of attention. 

"Old friend." 

She said with her irreproachable British accent. 

"Old friend of whom?" 

She was losing her patient. _Breath in, hold, count to five and let go. You are dealing with worse than her every single day, you can do it._

"Dragon Lady herself." 

Girl who was sitting behind tried not to laugh. After all everyone knew Miranda did not have friends. How bloody could she? 

"Yeah, tell me now that you are a Q..."

"Oh Queen herself at the Runway! What do we own the pleasure?" 

Nigel's cheerful voice rang through well lit entrance of Runway. Clarisse cocked her eyebrow and looked at the girl who was in shocked. She turned around, smiling brightly to well dressed man. 

"Good afternoon, my dear." 

She offered her hand, nodding when he lifted it gently to his lips. Soft kiss, she did not feel a thing - and she was grateful for it. She truly hated hand kissing.

"Thought we seen the last of you, ma'am,  after San Francisco. She didn't even looked at the pictures afterwards." 

Clarisse smirked, looking at the girl who looked as if she'd seen a ghost. 

"Of course, ego got in the way." 

"So as I heard. So The Closet?" 

"Certainly not her office! Two can play a game." 

"Are you actually going to do that?" 

"Of course, I am. I give it 7 minutes and then everyone will know that snobbish old lady came here as Miranda's friend and Nigel took her to The Closet. Besides.."

She looked over her shoulder at young woman who was talking fast on the phone. 

"She does not have the slightest idea who I am."

Nigels smirked, walking towards the glass door. 

"Bet me on 5 minutes. I do want to see her face." 

"Yes, Queen of Drama will come to an action." 

"Meanwhile I want to hear your version." 

* * *

 

"Is it really that hard to get me proper coffee?" 

 

Miranda snapped, going through her office. Was it actually that hard, she thought, sighing. For last four months nothing had been right - quite the opposite. Everything seemed to be falling apart. Another divorce, another scandal and yet she did not care about all those. She cared about  _ **her**_. Her perfect blue eyes beauty who was right then - Miranda looked at her watch - was sleeping on her King's size bed. She did it again. Both of them, you may say. Clarisse didn't say a word, Miranda left without waiting for explanation of Queen's action. Too proud to do it. How could she? The Dragon lady, Bitch in heels, Snow Queen - her ego spoke for itself. She was too stubborn to listen, to wait, to give a chance. Four months of hell, not only for Miranda, but for everyone. She made sure everyone else felt it, the boss from hell came back with double impet after San Francisco visit few months prior. 

 

"For god's sake, how long do you want me to wait?" 

 

She snapped again, this time - however - she wasn't even bothered to look up from The Book. She tried hard to focus in the words and images on the black pages but all she could think of was ** _Clarisse_**.

 

"I am sorry Miranda." 

Emily's British accent rang through her mind making her - if that was even possible - more angry. 

"Some snobbish lady came to the office and demanded to talk to you." 

Miranda's head snapped and she could feel how she became pale. __What the hell was she doing in here?_ _

"And of course you could not be bothered to inform me, could you?" 

Her voice was cold as ice, making young redhair woman shiver. 

"No, um, I thought she was joking. Though she did sound demanding."

Girl swallowed hard when she saw Miranda's growing smirk. 

_Fuck._

_That was never a good sign._

_Emily was fucked._

"And are you going to tell me where is that snobbish lade now?" 

Emily's blood was running fast through the veins and her breath quickened. She really was in trouble. 

"Nigel and The Closet." 

Aha, the two can play a game them, she thought, looking at Emily. 

"Did she say who was she?" 

"Old friend of yours." 

Miranda snorted, lifting herself up from comfortable leather chair.  

"Let's the show begin then." 

She said and walked in direction of the Closet. Only then Emily had realised how truly fucked she was. 

 

 


	10. Snobbish old British lady

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And they meet again.

_Why am I even here?_  Her thought to herself, standing in front of full length mirror.  _ _T_ his is ridiculous.  I really should not have come, not again. She does not want me. She walked away. Twice. Why would she want me now? Why did I come back? What am I doing? T_houghts were running through Clarisse's mind, making her feel dizzy. She was there, she was in New York. Hell, she was in Runway's office. In the damn Closet, picking up her dress for tonight. 

"You think too much." 

Adjusting her dress, Nigel sigh. He knew something had happened - never in his life before had he seen Miranda so angry and utterly out of place - for months ago. Every since they had left San Francisco the tension was unbearable, making hell of everyone's life. Miranda, maybe the Devil in Prada and Bitch from Hell, was not herself. She worked more, which meant that everyone else worked more. She was impulsive, tired and - god help him - really sad. There was time that despite stress and the magazine she smiled, only in his presence of course. But now? Sadness, desperation and lack of sleep, nothing more. The spark was gone as soon as she was on her flight back to NY. 

"She has changed again." 

Softly spoken words made Clarisse shivered. 

"How?" 

She asked, trying her best not to slip from facade of Ice Queen. Too many people were around to see it, though they may have not any idea who she was, they would eventually know the truth. 

"Different. This time is different." 

Smoothing silk fabric on her arms, Nigel zipped up perfectly cut dress. Dress made especially for her; for Clarisse, for that evening. She knew Miranda would be there, she knew she would see her and that familiar twinkle in emerald eyes. 

"Care to elaborate? I don't have all day for that nonsense." 

He just chuckled. It may seem unbelievable how similar those women were. 

"This time sadness, lack of sleep and pure evil hell." 

Clarisse bite her lower, splendidly coloured, lip. She could feel her heart breaking - again. She let that happen - again. Suddenly she was terrified. Her Majesty, Queen Clarisse Renaldi of Genovia was shaking with fear. Not because she was afraid of Miranda - she never was - but because that look in her eyes, the disappointment and sadness. She knew it would break her heart as much as she broke Miranda - for second time. Her skin became pale, labor breathing and quickened heartbeats. It was time to face the devil herself. 

"Ach, the snobbish old British lady." 

Everything froze. Both women could feel gaze of others at their bodies. Their eyes met in the mirror. No more twinkle, no more sparks. Two pairs of cold, sad, tired and old eyes. Was it only few months ago when they same eyes begged for more silently? Begged for these little touches, little kisses and fingertips everywhere? 

"It is better than 'Her Majesty can I please make some tea in the worst china on earth?'"

Silence. 

People looked as if they saw a ghost. 

"Shall I call for the security, Miranda?" 

Silver haired woman snorted, eyeing her assistant. 

"You really do know who she is, do you?" 

Her voice was deadly cold, making everyone shiver. Even Clarisse who quickly changed back into her black dress. She did look like snobbish old British lady without her crown. Redhair girl hesitated, looking at Nigel's amused face. She was in even bigger troubles now. 

Shit. 

"No, I do not know." 

Miranda cocked her eyebrows, playing with the soft Hermes' scarf material. It smelled like Clarisse; her scent was intoxicating.

"I never thought I would see the Dragon lady in action."

Clarisse smirked.

"Don't be such drama Queen, Clarisse."

Clarisse couldn't help but laugh at Miranda's remarke.

"Well technically, I am the Queen. Adding few epithets to my title does not make any difference now, does it, Mrs Priestly?"

Oh yes, Clarisse was good at this game. She could sass as no one else.  

"Emily?" 

Young woman shivered again, trying to be as calm as possible. I love my job, I love my job, I love my job, like matra in her mind.

"Black tea. But first pour milk into a cup – one quarter – then holding tea infuser over the cup, pour water through it. Do not add sugar nor make it differently than I told you to or you will meet Her Majesty's infamous gaze." 

 _Queen?_ Emily looked at Nigel who was - frankly speaking - way too amused for this situation. 

"And coffee. Five minutes. My office. Do not make me fire you." 

"Who is the drama Queen now?" 

Clarisse smiled, taking her scarf from Miranda's hands, making sure that they hands touched. Soft moan escaped her lips, when cold eyes met again.  Before Clarisse could notice, Miranda turned around and walked through the glass door.

"That certainly went well."

“Oh do shut up Nigel. And deal with them." 

She hissed through her clenched teeth. That wasn't about the game anymore, that had finished. They always had mocked each other but this time... This time the look in those amazing green eyes said everything. Lost abillity to sleep, to feel, to found the happiness despite cold facade. Only then Clarisse realised how she destroyed Miranda when she was still young and inexperienced girl. Always duty card, always the best excuse which destroyed everything that ever was dear and precious to her. Sighing, she went after Miranda on her exorbitantly high black high heels. 

"What was that about?!"

Emily exclaimed, looking at Nigel who suddenly became terrified. 

"Do go and make that tea and bring her coffee." 

No further explanations were needed, she only nodded. 

* * *

 

Miranda's office was lighstom and big - so much different from Clarisse's one. She could tell that as soon as she stood on fluffy white carpet, muffling clatter of her heels. 

"What are you doing here?" 

Miranda did not have to look from the window to sense older woman's presence. Her scent gave her away. The most perfect fragrance -  so feminine, so strong, so Clarisse. Coco Chanel No 5 and Queen's natural smell gave the most intoxicating aroma. It made people lose their minds. It made people crazy. It made people realise how sensual Clarisse Renaldi was; despite her age. But for Miranda her age was everything. That perfect blue eyed women, she was everything one could ever have dreamed of. 

"Tonight's ball. I believe I got the invitation." 

Renaldi snapped. 

"Well bloody well not from me." 

Miranda was looking through the large window. No one knew what she felt, no one ever had that ability. No one but **_her._  **All those people walking through the New York streets knew her as Dragon Lady who did not have any feelings left. But, goddamnit, she felt. She felt sadness, that awful disappointment and heartache. She felt maternal love, she felt the happiness very time girls hugged her. She felt - all those years ago - that she was loved. She was loved and loved only once in her life. And the very same person who had broken her heart - _twice_ \- was standing in her office, making her shived under her burning gaze. 

"Why are you here, Clarisse?" 

She turned around and one - very lonely - tear ran down her pale and tired face. 

"You do know why I am here, Miranda. You know exactly." 

Clarisse's voice was rising with every spoken word. 

"I do not fucking care, Clarisse. I do not care why are you here. I do not care about tonight's ball. I do not care about you!" 

Her words were sharp like a knife, cutting through Queen's skin. She would hold her tears, she told herself. She would not give her that privilege to see her undoing again. She would not...

"How dare you?!" 

But she was not able to control her anger. Her Majesty, The Ice Queen, that Damn Renaldi without heart, lost it. 

"How dare you speaking to me like that!" 

She shouted. 

"You are not The Queen here, Clarisse! You are nothing here!" 

Miranda snapped back. 

"So it is okay for you to come back after forty - fucking - years and mess with my head so hard that I did not know what was real and then just walking away when things were getting uncomfortable for you?" 

Both women, who never ever shouted, were in trans. Not the deadly cold voice, no. It was long gone; after those years, every misunderstanding and killing silence, waves of anger hit them with double impact. 

"Get out!"

Miranda hissed, looking in the most beautiful pair of blue eyes on earth. 

"No."

Clarisse answered.

"What did you just say to me?" 

"I am not one of them, for god's sake, Miranda. I won't do whatever - the hell - you may want. I am not your goddamn puppy to listen to you and I will not leave, because unlike you I am not a coward." 

"Yes, you bloody are." 

"Just because I have dam duty..." 

"DO not start with this, with duty. Always duty to everyone but yourself. Look in my eyes and say it out loud, when was the last time you commit something in duty for no one else but yourself? Always fucking Genovia, always the Crown. You are a coward, Clarisse. You are hiding behind your jewels, because you know you cannot get hurt there. You are no one else but damn coward."

No one - ever - saw Miranda that angry and, at the same time, desperate. 

"Stop it, Miranda." 

"Why? Things are getting uncomfortable for someone? Hurt ego? Too proud to listen." 

"You are walking on a very thin ice, Miranda. Stop it." 

Clarisse wasn't because of those words - she had heard worse. She was hurting because they were true. Every little thing silver haired woman spoke was true. And true, no matter what, always hurt. 

"Truth hurts, doesn't it Clarisse? How does it feel to live in lie for forty years? Always the most dangerous woman in the world. The most powerful of all of us, is living in lie, because it is better to use duty as her cover because it is easier to admit the truth." 

Clarisse's heart was breaking into uncountable number of pieces. The truth, indeed, hurt. But she would not cry. She would not give that satisfaction to Miranda. She would never do it to anyone. Queen was too proud for that. 

"How dare you saying that? How dare you accusing me of those things, when you yourself are not better? You are a fucking hypocrite who cares only for yourself. Have you thought about your children while getting - another - divorce?" 

"Do not dare making it about twins." 

Miranda snapped, trembling with anger. 

"Your hypocrisy is beyond everything. So fucking protective now, are you?" 

"Shut up!" 

"You are acting like bloody teeneanger now, Miranda." 

"Trust me, I do not care anymore. I want you out of my sight. It is over Clarisse. I don't want to see nor talk to you. Get out." 

Clarisse's heart - and Miranda's for that matter - sank down. As soon as Dragon lady said that sentences she had tears in her eyes. Her heart was pounding and then, she was praying that Clarisse would not say these awfully bad two...

"Very well." 

And that was all. Fighting tears and internal scream, Clarisse turned around and walked away. Watching her disappearing Miranda realised what on earth had she done. She did not care, not anymore, for hot tears running down her face and vanishing in soft material of her blouse. 

"I know you are there, Nigel." 

She cried out, between - relatively - silent sobbs. 

"Oh Miranda, what in the name of God have you done to her and to yourself." 

He said softly and first time in her entire life Miranda _fucking_ Preistly let herself being held while she cried. 

 

 


End file.
